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And Hummels wants to walk out on that, for what? To join a perennial powerhouse that would likely rack up silverware with him or without him? One that will have a new manager next season, with all the uncertainty that implies? For more money? (Reports say this isn't the case, but who the heck knows?)

Fifa Manager 14 With Crack

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I didn't think I'd see the day when a Manchester United manager would talk about "sex masochism." It's fine. I get it; Louis Van Gaal was discussing the Marouane Fellaini vs. Robert Huth incident and how Fellaini reacted to having his hair pulled. He joked that the only time that's appropriate is within some kind of S&M context, and we all had a right giggle because, you know, talking about sex is funny. We're childish that way.

I have no idea if it was some surreptitious ploy to circumvent the ban or why Simeone's goalkeeping coach was up in the stands. But there's an obvious common sense solution with managerial bans. Don't let them come to the stadium. Make them watch the game somewhere else with a chaperone from the league to ensure there's no funny business. Case closed.

Fifa wants to crack down on corruption after a series of match-fixing scandals has damaged football around the world. One such incident in Germany ended with a jail term for a referee who fixed matches. In Brazil, meanwhile, as many as 11 top division games were declared void after another referee admitted he was up to no good.

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